Month: October 2023

From being stressed all the time to stress-free

Neera

In 2023, I went from being stressed all the time to being stress-free for life.

It’s that time of the year when I look back and make a note of the things I achieved, mistakes I made, and lessons I learned.

As I am working through them, I realize there are several stories hidden in them that could help my readers.

For the next few days, I am going to share them here.

The first one that stands out is how I got rid of stress from my life forever.

I remember, back in November 2022, I was flat out trying to finish several projects before the end of the year that it was affecting me not only mentally, but physically.

My eyes were so tired and dried that I couldn’t keep them open. I hadn’t gone to the gym for most of the year and quit walking for months.

I thought if I could just finish this project and this project and this project… I will be fine.

But I wasn’t.

The more I did, the more work piled up.

And the irony was, I was retired and supposedly pursuing my hobbies.

Then one day, I came across an advertisement on Instagram. It was Vishen Lakhiani talking about the De Silva Meditation Method.

On an impulse, I bought the course.

In fact, I bought Mindvalley membership which had the De Silva Meditation course and hundreds of other courses by top coaches in the world.

For the next 28 days, I religiously meditated twice a day using De Silva’s techniques taught by Vishen Lakhiani.

I also started a journal to record my progress and insights. The image below shows what I wrote on the first day of starting the program.

By Day 9, I was much more relaxed. All the unnecessary fears and anxieties were gone. I was performing in a much-relaxed state. This is what I wrote in my journal:

“I have eliminated the word stress from my vocabulary and replaced it with relax. Relax is my default state from now on. There is no rush. Only calm. ‘Calm’ is positive, while ‘rush’ is negative. I am getting the same amount of work done, if not more, by being in a relaxed state of mind.”

By the end of the program, I was a new person.

What surprised me was that the transformation was permanent.

It’s almost a year, and not even once I felt rushed or stressed.

I think you can achieve the same, by whatever meditation practice you use. Just instill the message in you that you are replacing the word ‘stress’ with ‘relax’ in your dictionary. And you can get more work done by being in a relaxed state of mind.

See you in the morning

Neera

As I sat down to write my update yesterday, the phone rang.

It was my friend’s husband.

“We had to take Adrianne to the hospital on Wednesday. She will not make it. If you want to see her, don’t leave it for later.”

My heart bled. I have known Adrianne for over 20 years now. She was in the very first writing course I joined. She became my biggest supporter, urging me to keep writing endeavors, even when constructing coherent sentences or expressing my thoughts on paper felt like a daunting task.

After the course finished, we kept meeting at my house once a month, writing and sharing stories from our lives.

She is an amazing woman. Firey, feisty, an advocate for women’s rights. She is a force to be reckoned with. Longing for love and acceptance throughout her entire life, even when her own mother treated her poorly (going as far as calling her a ‘failed abortion’), she had an abundance of love to offer.

She is the most compassionate individual I’ve met in my life. Despite having so little, she gave generously and without reservation. For half of her career, she served as a certified teacher, and for the remaining half, she worked as a certified nurse. Her entire life was dedicated to serving others, using both her professional expertise and her boundless kindness.

However, she has endured immense suffering. Her initial spouse was deeply troubled, and he made severe threats against her and her three children, putting their lives in danger.

All of her children have passed away and over the last three years, she has been grappling with excruciating, arthritic pain. Yet she never lost either her fighting spirit or sense of humor. She is my hero.

I went and saw her in the hospital an hour after the call. The fiery, feisty, 87-year-old dynamo was curled up like a newborn in the vast expanse of the hospital bed. Although heavily drugged, she recognized me.


“How are you, Adrianne?” I asked.
“A little older, my dear,” she said.
“How are you feeling?” I asked.
“Pathetic,” she said.
“What is the plan?” I asked
“See you in the morning,” she said.
May god relieve her from her pain and give her a better life next time.
The one she really deserves.