Notes on Mental Models

A mental model is simply a representation of how something works.

Mental models are how we understand concepts and, through them, the world. Not only do they help us understand complex theories, they help us make connections with what we already know.

Mental models are great tools for learning. They help simplify complexity. We cannot keep all the details of the world in our brains, so we use models to simplify the complex into understandable and organizable chunks.

In 1990, in a famous speech, Charlie Munger, a billionaire investor and the vice chairman of Warren Buffett’s investment firm, Berkshire Hathaway summed up the approach to practical wisdom through understanding mental models.

“Well, the first rule is that you can’t really know anything if you just remember isolated facts and try and bang ’em back. If the facts don’t hang together on a latticework of theory, you don’t have them in a usable form. You’ve got to have models in your head. And you’ve got to array your experience both vicarious and direct on this latticework of models. You may have noticed students who just try to remember and pound back what is remembered. Well, they fail in school and in life. You’ve got to hang experience on a latticework of models in your head.”

Metal Motels are tools for thinking

The quality of our thinking is proportional to the models in our head and their usefulness in the situation at hand. The more models you have — the bigger your toolbox — the more likely you are to have the right models to see reality. It turns out that for improving your ability to make decisions variety matters.

Here is a list of some useful metal models:

  • Pareto’s Principle — “For many outcomes roughly 80% of consequences come from 20% of the causes.”
  • Murphy’s Law — “Anything that can go wrong, will.”
  • Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) — “A pervasive apprehension that others might be having rewarding experiences from which one is absent.”
  • Butterfly Effect — “The concept that small causes can have large effects.”
  • Parkinson’s Law — “Work expands to fill the time available for its completion.”
  • Hofstadter’s Law, “It always takes longer than you expect, even when you consider Hofstadter’s Law.”
  • Eisenhower’s decision matrix — “what is important is seldom urgent, and what is urgent is seldom important.”
  • Imposter Syndrome — “High-achieving individuals, marked by an inability to internalize their accomplishments and a persistent fear of being exposed as a ‘fraud.’”
  • Deliberate Practice — “How expert one becomes at a skill has more to do with how one practice than with merely performing a skill many times.”
  • First principles thinking — Breaking down a problem into its fundamental building blocks, and then reassembling them from the ground up. It is one of the best ways to reverse-engineer complicated problems and unleash creative possibilities.
  • Second-order thinking—Thinking farther ahead than just the first level. Not only the immediate consequences of an action but the subsequent effects of those actions as well. Like a chess player thinking many moves ahead.
  • Inversion — Solving hard problems by inverting them or addressing them backward. For example, spend less time trying to be brilliant and more time trying to avoid obvious stupidity.

There are hundreds more mental models. Do you have a favorite one? One which you use a lot.

I used it quite a lot in my writing. I have written about them in an article Mental Models For Writers.

Mistakes I Made In 2022, And Will Make Them Again In 2023

Okay, I am going to lay it out in the open.

There are several mistakes I made this year, some that caused me a lot of stress, others I am too ashamed to admit.

But I am going to list them here, and openly admit that I am likely to make them again.

I will also give my reasons, and you are welcome to judge me.

I set too many goals for the year.

As the end of 2022 is drawing near, and I was reading my Author Business Plan to see how I fared against it, I realized how ambitious I was while setting goals for the year.

Have a look:

Image by the author

Back in January, I was of the mindset that I would write a book a month, so I had listed 13 non-fiction books that I was going to write. That is more than the number of months in the year!

As if that wasn’t enough, I had jotted in 3 fiction books for a good measure.

But wait, there is more.

I was to create 3 courses, write 100 Medium articles, 52 issues of the newsletter, and 300+ social media posts (mainly LinkedIn).

BIG MISTAKE.

But it is a mistake I am likely to make again in 2023.

Although I didn’t meet many of my goals (only wrote 5 books, one fiction, and 4 non-fiction and only created 1 course), I strived hard to meet them.

I wrote over 300 social media posts, and I am on target to write 100 Medium articles and 52 newsletter issues.

In fact, I surpassed certain goals (wrote 16 extra issues of the newsletter for paid subscribers) and created a bigger and better course ‘Write Your Book In 30 Days,’ and ran 3 iterations of that.

Now, towards the end of the year, I am tired and keep reminding myself not to set so many goals next year. But it is highly likely, after a few days’ rest in the lead up to the New Year, I will start itching to set goals, and I know they won’t be limited.

I like to challenge myself. I know even if I don’t meet all of my goals; I do meet quite a few of them and I am a better person (and a better writer) because of those goals.

So, don’t believe me if I say I am going to have a relaxed year next year.

Set tight deadlines.

I was crazy about setting deadlines.

I would give myself just a month to write a book. Out of that, many days would be consumed in fighting fires and all I would be left with was a couple of weeks at the most. Still, I would keep telling myself that I could do it.

A sane person would give themselves more time, but not me. I am a very tough boss.

BIG MISTAKE.

A mistake I will make again next year, I am afraid.

I have my reasons for that. As my skills are improving and I have put many systems in place, I think I am getting better at meeting deadlines.

Besides, there will always be fires. Life is one big inferno and we shouldn’t spend all our energy to keep putting fires off. Let them burn on the side and we keep doing whatever we think we should do.

Worked on multiple projects at a time.

Alright, I admit, I am a multipotentialite — a person with multiple passions.

I get excited with new ideas and I start working on them straight away. That’s why I end up working on several things at a time. A big drawback of this obsession is, I am not able to give my 100% to each project and many times head straight towards burnout.

BIG MISTAKE.

Working on one project at a time makes you less stressed and has better outcomes. Would you do it, woman?

I am afraid I won’t.

Reason? Whenever I get a new idea, there is an energy associated with it. I want to cash in on that energy. It leads to me getting in the flow state and finishing that project in half the time. Yes, the scheduled project suffers, and sometimes doesn’t get finished at all. But I accept that and take the blame for it. But I do not want to keep working on a project just because I have scheduled it for that time.

I love acting on whims. Spontaneity is a big driver in my creative life.

Didn’t write a detailed diary during the holidays.

There was so much material that I could have written an article every day. Instead, I chose to relax and enjoy the day. Sometimes I would just read, other times I would catch up on my sleep.

I did share some travel stories through LinkedIn posts and my newsletter, but that was all.

BIG MISTAKE.

I missed out on the opportunity to write about the unique and profound experiences I was having.

Would I repeat the mistake and write an extensive journal in future travels?

Probably not.

There are several reasons for that. First, there is hardly any free time during travel. Whenever there is, I am so tired and I prefer to sleep rather than fight the fatigue and write.

Second, memories form after the travel is over. During travels, things feel mundane and trivial. Allow a few months to pass and memories start popping up and stories start forming. That’s the time to write a travel memoir.

So, please forgive me if I do not write detailed travel articles while traveling.

Ignored my health

Okay, I admit, year after year, I am making the same mistakes.

Choosing to sit in front of the computer rather than going for a walk (even when the weather is good, like right now).

Choosing to eat unhealthy food rather than the healthy options which are readily available.

But unhealthy choices are much more inviting and taste much better. I keep opting for sugary treats, cakes, bread, and carbs in any form.

BIG MISTAKE.

I am old enough (and wise enough) to know that I should eat better to escape the dreadful consequences of unhealthy eating.

Would I change my unhealthy habits?

Unlikely.

Doesn’t matter how hard I try, I get better for a few days and then revert to old habits.

My excuse — life is for enjoyment. In a few years’ time, I won’t be able to eat much. Why not enjoy the better-tasting food while I can?

(Okay, okay. I get it. I am working on this one and promise to be a bit better next year.)

Alright, these were my frank admission of the mistakes I made this year and will perhaps continue to make.

It is your turn now.

What mistakes did you make this year and think you will continue to make next year too?

Share them in the comment section. Don’t be shy. We are all friends here!

To make you feel better about making mistakes, I will leave you with a quote from Neil Gaiman:

I hope that in this year to come; you make mistakes.

Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, and changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re Doing Something.

So that’s my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody’s ever made before. Don’t freeze, don’t stop, don’t worry that it isn’t good enough, or it isn’t perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life.

Whatever it is you’re scared of doing, do it.

Make your mistakes, next year and forever.

Seven Things About Which I Changed My Mind This Year (For The Better)

Gym Time

I used to leave going to the gym to the end of the day. This year I started going in the mornings.

I have two alarms in the morning. 6:00 AM, when I get up, brush my teeth, and then meditate and write in my journal till the second alarm goes off at 7:00 AM. This is when I change and head for the gym. The group classes start at 7:30 AM. I aim to attend five each week. I am so pleased that I have been able to stick to the routine for most of the days unless I was traveling.

Weight Management

I gave up on losing weight for the past three years. No matter what I did, my weight was not moving. Thinking I can’t lose the middle age mid-section, I had made my peace with my bulging tummy.

But during travels, it got ridiculously big. So much so that I started feeling disgusted. This year, I accepted that I am addicted to sugar and I will always need to be on some sort of program to keep it under check. I joined Weight Watchers again (I am a life member) and beginning to lose weight a bit by bit.

Intermittent Fasting

I resisted intermittent fasting for 3 years, thinking I can’t do it. This year, I started having breakfast at midday rather than at 9:30 AM. I was one of those who thought breakfast was the most important meal of the day and that one ought to have a good breakfast each morning.

Not true. I could easily stretch the breakfast till mid-day. That helped me skip a meal a day. Now I can fast for 16 hours and eat only in an 8-hour window. I am getting used to staying a little hungry and don’t reach for food at the first sign of hunger.

Speaking To A Camera

I thought I will never be comfortable talking to a camera. This year I recorded the ‘Write Your Book In 30 Days’ course in two days flat. Later in the year, I did a course on public speaking. Now I am much more comfortable in front of the camera.

Meditation

I thought I was done with meditation. It was useful when my life was chaotic and stressful. I learned active meditation and found that I can tap into inspiration and intuition any time I want with 5-minute meditation exercises.

Shitty Drafts

I was taught to write shitty drafts for books and polish them later with several edits. This year I learned, it saves a lot of time to write once and to write a good first draft. I have given up writing shitty drafts anymore. This year, during NaNoWriMo, I published my novel on Medium as I wrote it. You can read it here.

Cyclic Writing

I used to think my work has to go through several edits before publishing. I learned Dean Wesley Smith’s method of cyclic writing and applied it to my writing. It worked like magic.

Dean has written over 200 novels and 100 short stories. He has won several awards as well. He hates rewriting. His process is, which he calls ‘cycling,’ to write 500–600 words, read and edit them, and then write the next 500 words.

I realized I follow this process when I write articles on Medium. I now have adopted it as my primary process, both for fiction and non-fiction.

What have you changed your mind about this year?

Don’t Just Look For A Solution To A Problem (Instead, focus on what you want.)

I prided myself as a great problem solver when a casual talk with a friend opened my eyes to another possibility — to be more than just a problem solver.

I was on the phone with a friend and after an hour-long catch-up, I made the remark to wrap up the conversation, “I am glad we found the solution to my problem.”

This friend of mine is a coach, and she opened her coaching practice recently after eighteen months of wilderness. My remark led to a full-blown coaching session with her in which she probed me to examine my thinking.

“Rather than focusing on solving the problem, think about what you really want. How and when won’t be the questions when you know what you really want,” she said.

She was right.

Problem-solving gives us only a limited range of possibilities.

Her advice reminded me of something I read in Robert Fritz’s book The Path Of Least Resistance.

When you focus on solving a problem, you can’t help inheriting the assumptions baked into it.

The focus limits you to a very narrow range of outcomes, all of them leading towards, ‘I want this problem to go away.’

When you take action to lessen a problem, you have less of a problem — so, of course, you are less motivated to keep addressing it.

Let’s say, we resolve to make some improvement — in our life, our relationships, our finances, and our community — it works for a while, but then it fizzles out, and we resume our old ways.

We blame a lack of self-discipline or conclude that circumstances were against us.

But there’s a more intriguing explanation for this sort of defeat.

What if ‘solving the problem’ was the reason we cannot solve the problem?

Fritz suggests:

Instead of focusing on the problem, ask yourself, what do you want to create?

If we focus on creating rather than problem-solving, we will feel less discouraged by the discrepancy between what we want and what we think we ought to do.

That is the dilemma we all go through more than we like. We face predicaments arising from contradictions, variance, inconsistencies, and expectations.

According to Fritz:

Creators have a higher ability to tolerate discrepancies than most others. This is because discrepancy is the stock in the trade of the creator.

When you create, you become a player of forces, such as — contrasts, opposites, similarities, differences, time, balance, and so on. To the creator, all these forces are useful.

When there is more discrepancy, there is more force to work with.

If there is less, there is more momentum as you move toward the final creation of the result.

Creating is no problem and problem-solving is not creating.

When choosing what to create, you do not choose what you do not want. You choose what you want.

A creator’s motivation is different. Their motivation is for their creation to exist.

A creator creates to bring the creation into being.

A creator creates regardless of his emotions.

For creators, emotions are not the centerpiece of their lives, they do not pander to them. They create what they create, not in reaction to their emotions, but independently of them.

They can create on days filled with the depths of despair. They can create on days filled with the heights of joy.

As a creator, you become a river, going through life and taking the path of least resistance.

More of life should be approached as creation rather than problem-solving.

Decide what you want, take stock of your reality, and then take the necessary actions to invent the outcome you seek.

My friend’s advice changed my whole outlook. I no longer focus on problems, but stay tuned to what I want. What I really, really want. Once I figure that out, the ‘how’ and ‘when’ take care of themselves.

Capturing The ‘Hope Moments’

I half-sit in bed in a sleepy state and let the thoughts pass through my mind.

Mostly, I am not even aware of what thoughts are crossing my mind, but now and then I see sparks. Like the one that comes out of a fairy’s magic wand and I sit up a little bit straight and make a mental note of it.

Author John Brandon calls them the ‘hope moments’.

Think of hope moments as those small, delightful insights in the morning that come from somewhere beyond ourselves. — John Brandon

I had never heard of the term ‘hope moments’ before reading John Brandon’s book 7-Minute Productivity Solution.

Brandon suggests capturing them before the realities of the day crush them.

A hope moment could be a fleeting thought that someone has called you for a job opportunity.

Or it could be the thought that you will meet someone special and end up marrying them.

You might wake up with an idea or insights or a plain old wish.

What a great feeling such thoughts bring.

They are like a spark or a light bulb, filling you up with hope because it’s not based on realistic expectations.

We all need hope in our lives. More than goals.

It’s important to mull over the joys and sorrows of life, but what we need most in our lives is — hope.

You could argue that hope is the opposite of a goal.

Hope is what could be; a goal is what must be.

Hope has no limits, a goal is confined and specific that must be tracked.

Goals are great, but hope should take precedence over goals and should drive us.

Hope fills us with drive and passion, whereas a goal is a limited and short-term undertaking.

Hope can help us overcome incredible suffering and disappointment, whereas a goal gives us an objective to finish a marketing report by dinner.

Start the day with hope.

We have more hope in the mornings before the cold hard truth settles in.

Hope moments occur before we reach for our mobile phones and start checking the news and social media notifications.

Most of us start the day with brilliant ideas, new insights, and a wonderful outlook.

Is it possible to maintain that attitude all day?

Yes, it is, by writing down the ‘hope moments,’ so that we don’t lose them when the day sets in.

Recording them helps connect the dots between what we do today and the purpose in life.

By recording hope moments, you’re making sure you’re aware of the patterns and connections in your life that lead to fulfillment. The word fulfillment means the achievement of something desired.

Not knowing where you are going, what you are doing, or why you are doing, it is the opposite of fulfillment. It leads to burnout, distracted living, and hopelessness.

Sometimes, big ambitions seem unattainable.

It’s important to step aside from our goals occasionally so that we can evaluate our bigger ambitions and decide if they are really worth attaining. — Charles Duhigg

The morning routine is not meant for mere goal setting and task allocation. It’s a way to ponder the day in an unstructured way.

When we write our ambitions and hopes in a journal, we’re attempting to catalyze the ambitions we have into attainable, bite-sized nuggets that are far more achievable — life setting, not goal setting.

A plan to turn my ‘hope moment’ into reality

I captured a ‘hope moment’ this morning — Wouldn’t it be nice if I had finished all the projects I started this year. Then I will be ready to greet the new year with a clean slate.

As the thought crossed my mind, I immediately got energized. Maybe it is possible to finish all the unfinished projects of this year. My mind immediately started making plans. I reached for a pen and pad and made a list:

  • Finish writing the book that I started in January this year.
  • Compile a mini-guide I had scheduled for December.
  • Draw 122 sketches that I missed drawing in the daily diary.
  • Write and publish 15 articles on Medium (that’s an article a day + 3 more)
  • Write 3 newsletters scheduled for this month.

These were my unachieved goals. But by seeing them as ‘hope moments’ they suddenly become plausible.

  • The 15 articles I am writing could become the chapters of the book. 122 sketches are just 12 sketches a day.
  • It will take me two days to write the mini-guide.
  • I have already started working on the newsletters. Besides, I can keep them short because readers are busy with Christmas and holidays.
  • I take 5 minutes to draw a sketch. I can knock six in half an hour. If I do two sessions, all the sketches will be done too.

I may not achieve all these, but they certainly make me feel excited.

It is possible to maintain a high level of hope throughout the day.

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When Your Passion Becomes Your Obsession

There is a difference between passion and obsession.

Passion is a positive word that leads to growth, self-improvement, and perhaps one’s purpose in life; obsession, on the other hand, has a negative connotation about it, which could lead to being out of control and even mentally sick.

When you are passionate, everybody cheers you on, “Oh! you found your passion. Great! Be passionate! Follow your passion! Reach your goals! Live your dream!” People encourage you because they think you are on to something.

But when you are obsessed, they go, “Why you gotta be so crazy? Why do you spend so much time on [thing]?” Why can’t you be reasonable about it?” “You don’t have to be so preoccupied with it, it’s just a hobby (or a job, or a sport), isn’t it?”

When you are obsessed, people think you are nuts.

In life, you have a choice. You can either be passionate or obsessed.

Both choices are fine.

Being passionate about something is being in love with life.

But being obsessed with something is living life at another level.

I chose to be obsessed.

I don’t know when my passion for writing turned into an obsession.

When I started writing, I found the activity so calming and fulfilling that I became passionate about it. I dedicated time to it and strived to improve. As I became better and better at giving words to my thoughts, I started feeling good about my writing.

I could pour out all my frustrations, my negativity, my fears, my anger, my joy, and my daily happenings into my diary.

And that was when the problem began.

Something inside me changed. I craved writing all the time. I had to write every day. The day I didn’t write, was a day that didn’t exist for me.

I would rather write than attend a party or meet a friend for coffee, or go for a swim, or go for a walk.

My passion had become an obsession.

The Cambridge dictionary defines passion as an extreme interest in or wishes for doing something.

While an obsession is something that you think about all the time.

A passion is “extreme” but the aspect of time isn’t present.

An obsession stays “all the time”.

I think about writing all the time.

I work on getting better every day. I don’t rest. I can’t let it go. I am not content with my progress. I want to get better. I can’t accept the level I am at the moment. I know I could be better. I will continue to work on it until I reach the level where I want to be.

If you really want to achieve something worth achieving, you must get obsessed.

If you are not obsessed, you are not operating at your optimum potential.

If no one thinks you are crazy, you are not there yet.

You are not there yet until somebody in your life says, “Jee! you really care about this in a crazy way.” That’s when people see your obsession.

The weirder you are, the more committed you are to focus on your thing.

Obsession forces you to stay focused.

Obsession makes you keep going when others are partying, socializing, having fun, sleeping, or simply fitting in.

Obsession empowers you to find new ways to learn, to push your comfort zone, and to push yourself beyond what others or even you thought was not possible.

I love this quote from one of Bukowski’s numerous letters:

My dear,

Find what you love and let it kill you. Let it drain from you your all. Let it cling onto your back and weigh you down into eventual nothingness. Let it kill you, and let it devour your remains.

For all things will kill you, both slowly and fastly, but it’s much better to be killed by a lover.

Falsely yours,

Henry Charles Bukowski

I will rather let writing kill me than give it up for a mediocre life.

Are you passionate about something?

Is it turning into an obsession?