Category: Motivation

Make every day, a sexy day

Neera

“You can’t have each day as a ‘sexy’ day,” said my friend.

We were coming back from a parlor after having a facial. It was the highlight of the day for us. Something we wanted to do for months. Something we were looking forward to all week.

“Why not?” I protested.

“Because most days are mundane. The same job. The same housework. Even the entertainment is the same. There is nothing new. The same stuff over and over again.”

“Give me something to look forward to.” I said. “I don’t want to wake up each day to cook and clean and tire myself with mundane routine. I want to wake up to do something special each day.”

“Good luck to you then.” She said.

We had this conversation before I finished working and became a full-time writer.

In my new life, I wanted to do interesting stuff, so that I had something to look forward to each day.

I was determined to make each day count.

So,
I learned new skills.
I started my website.
I wrote a blogpost a day.
I wrote and self-published books.
I enrolled in several online courses.
I wrote on social media platforms.
I interviewed interesting people
I got interviewed.
I made friends.
I sketched.
I traveled.

I am a published author now.
People all over the world are reading my stories.
I have made friends in countries I still haven’t visited.
If I ‘Google’ my name, there is a ton of content with my name on it.

I am having a ‘sexy day,’ every day.

Some nights I am so excited, I find it hard to sleep.
I want the day to continue.

How are your days?
Are you having ‘sexy days?’
If not, what are you doing to make them ‘sexy days.’

Subscribe to my newsletter to get more writing like this one.

There is no better teacher than a failure

Neera

All my businesses failed to be profitable.

At age 28, I started an artificial jewelry business.

Imitating a friend who had a successful jewelry stall in a busy shopping center, I bought jewelry from India and tried to sell it at a local school fete. I barely recovered my money.

At age 37, I got into the real estate business. That was the year Australia experienced its worst recession. Needless to say, I didn’t sell a single house.

At age 41, I established a network marketing business with a reputed company. I spent thousands of dollars setting it up and advertising it.

I even went part time at my job letting go of half the salary for six months.

After giving it to my heart and soul for six years, I had to give it up.

For years, I saw myself as a failure.

Then one day, thinking about them from a different perspective, I realized they were not failures.

They were the stepping stones for bigger and better things in my life.

From the jewelry business, I learned how markets worked. I learned more by doing it and failing at it than I would have by succeeding at it.

From the real estate business, I learned about negotiations and my local housing market.

I saved thousands of dollars down the track when we bought our house and several investment properties.

From network marketing, I learned confidence in presenting ideas, self-mastery, and people management skills. They helped me to win leadership roles in my job.

I owe a lot of what I became in life to my network of marketing business mentors.

The monetary gains are not the only gains you should seek from endeavors you take.

You learn more from failing than you can from succeeding.

Two questions to ask yourself

Neera

Two questions you need to ask yourself.

  1. What will your success look like?
  2. At what point you will quit?

A few years ago, I read a book by Seth Godin called “The Dip.” It had a huge impact on me.

The dip is the lull in the excitement that happens after the rush of starting something new wears off. On the other side of the dip is success. The dip weeds out the people who will not make it. They hit the dip and give up.

A cul-de-sac, (French for “dead end”) is a situation where you work and work and work and nothing happens. Do you work through burnout, or do you recognize it as a cul-de-sac and just give it up so you can move on to something else?

There is nothing wrong with quitting. Winners quit all the time, they quit fast; they quit often and they quit without guilt. But they don’t quit before they are ready to quit. They determine beforehand when will they quit.

Here’s something I can tell you about the book I’m writing now. The one I’m burned out on and would love to never think about again.

I was excited about it until it dragged on and on and on. I have rewritten it at least six times. I am finding it hard to keep going. I’m in the dip for this project. But I am not going to quit. Because I had decided beforehand that I will quit if I can’t reach the mid-point. Once I crossed the mid-point I will keep going and publish the book no matter how unhappy I am with it.

I have passed the mid-point. The end part is not fun anymore. But it doesn’t have to be fun to be worth it. I am climbing through the dip,
to get to the other end.

Here’s an assignment for you:
Write down under what circumstances you’ll quit.

And then stick with it until then.

Decide who you want to be…

Neera

When I was growing up, I did not know what I wanted to be. but I knew what I didn’t want to be.

I knew for sure, that I didn’t want to be a teacher. Both my parents were teachers and I thought their life was boring.

Where my friend’s parents held “exciting” jobs (they were doctors, and engineers, owned a business or worked for the government). My parents went to school for the rest of their lives. ?

My lack of direction led to my biggest failure in life. I couldn’t pass the entrance exam to medical school. So clueless was I that I thought,
none of my friends will get through, as it is practically impossible to prepare for five subjects in a single day.

They all did. I was the only one who didn’t.

My friends wanted to become doctors. While I didn’t know what I wanted.

As life progressed, I stumbled through many professions, without much of a career goal. I followed a path I could see in front of me and took the opportunities as they arose.

But then, in my late fifties, I suddenly knew what I wanted to be.

I wanted to be a writer. Not just a writer, but an author of several books. But there was one tiny problem. My writing sucked.

But that minor detail didn’t stop me from becoming what I wanted to become. In mere four years, I became the author of four books.

Don’t underestimate the power of your desire. If your desire is strong enough, the universe bends it’s back to give you what you want.

But you got to know what you want.

Dolly Parton said, “Find out who you are and do it on purpose.”

It can’t be easier than that.

A Little Journal That Changed My Life

Neera

Years ago, I came across the idea of keeping a gratitude journal.

Dutifully, I bought a small spiral notebook and started writing three things I was grateful for

They were not big things, but little things like the yellow rose in my garden, the air-conditioning in my car, and a new pair of shoes that were sleek and comfortable.

That practice didn’t last for long.

I stopped and started several times.

Years later, when I was going through a bad patch in life, I stumbled upon the spiral notebook while going through my closet.

Rather than chucking the partially filled notebook into the bin, I opened it and started reading the entries.

Half an hour later, I was sitting on the floor, leaned against the closet, tears rolling down my eyes.

There were so many good things that happened in my life, and here I was agonizing over the little stuff.

Rather than feeling like a victim of fate, I saw how many blessings it had bestowed on me.

A gratitude journal may not seem a big thing while you are writing it, but over time, it becomes a powerful reminder of all the good things that happen to you.

I still don’t write in the journal every day. But it has got a permanent place on my bedside table and now and then, I pick it up, and jot down the three things I am grateful for.

Image by the author

If you haven’t got a gratitude journal, I strongly urge you to start one.

It will change your life.

Want to take your writing to another level? Subscribe to my weekly newsletter.